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PETER OUT OF ACTION DUE TO ACCIDENT Thanks for all your kind messages. Sorry for the delay in other responses: currently out of action: I'm also away for some of the next three weeks with the masterclasses as part of The Times Award. I'll deal with any queries just as soon as I can. Best Wishes Peter Devonald (5th July 2003) |
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Reuters report: WALL SOUGHT FOR QUESTIONING IN DEVONALD INCIDENT by staff writer KEVIN SCRANTZ Mon June 23, 2003
06:28 PM ET
According to stunned onlookers, Devonald, 29, was running after a tennis ball Saturday when a wall suddenly rose up in the center of the court. "It was the most extraordinary thing," said Hazel Brizzle of Ackerly. "This wall just came out of nowhere and attacked him. I have never seen anything like it." "We have every available man on it," said Sergeant Thurston Crowell of Sheffield constabulary, "in addition to a crack team of canines trained in sniffing out walls." Crowell added this was not the first time a wall has caused mayhem here. "It's a much more common occurrence in London, of course, but we get our fair share of walls in Sheffield. It's a menace people don't talk enough about. Until we promote wall awareness, they will continue to create havoc, and no one is really safe." The situation took a slightly more sinister tone early yesterday after a London tabloid reported Devonald's accident may have been the result of a "hit" ordered by one of Britain's royal family. According to the London Daily Scrotum, Devonald and an American co-writer are responsible for a scathing television pilot - SLICE OF LIFE - now in production which makes light of the Queen, who was greatly upset by its portrayal of her. "The rumors are completely unfounded," according to Buckingham Palace spokesman Buffy Torrington, "Her Majesty has never even seen the script though she was understandably enraged when she read of herself singing a Spice Girls song." Another, unidentified palace insider claims the Queen beat her breasts for over an hour after a copy of the script was intercepted. The Queen was spotted earlier today entering Westminster Abbey in the same smart gorilla suit she recently wore to grandson William's African-themed birthday party. The suit, which has created a worldwide fashion furor, has since become her trademark royal ensemble and is expected to become a regular feature of court protocol. Asked about the Scrotum's allegations, she insisted none of it was true. "I do not know Peter Devonald, but I will remember him in my prayers as I do all my loyal subjects. I will also present him with a signed photograph of myself en gorilla if he sends a stamped, self-addressed envelope." A similar photograph of the Queen reportedly cured a herd of cattle near Leeds of a suspected outbreak of foot and mouth disease. Devonald, who could not be reached for comment, is reportedly in seclusion and under police protection pending the wall's apprehension.
READ THE PITCH SO SHOCKING IT MIGHT HAVE LED TO THE WALL ATTACKING DEVONALD One
house, One 'reality' TV show, a whole heap of celebrities.
For scripts or full treatments contact pdevonald@hotmail.com : I'll respond just as soon as I can. OR PD/ KEVIN SCRANTZ SCRIPTS - CONTACT HIM AT: krazkjn@cox-internet.com CLICK HERE FOR MAIN PAGE OF WEBSITE All rights reserved 2003-2009: PETER DEVONALD |